Potty Mouth.

This guy is lucky he's a prince because with a weak ass head of hair like that he would never have been able to mack a top notch breezy like Kate.

A while ago when the news was all over Michelle Obama's "inappropriate" behavior for putting her arm around the Queen of England, I almost had a heart attack. Not because of the shock of the queen's disgusting face and her unbelievable uselessness or for the fact that Michelle didn't seem to care about tradition, but because this was one of the top stories on AMERICAN news. Last I checked, we won the Revolutionary War and therefore got the honor of ridding ourselves of the pointless royal family. OK, I'm sure many Americans watched the whole Princess Di thing unfold but let's get real, most people thought it was a special edition of "Most Insanely Awesome Car Chases!" And it was awesome indeed. We've also rocked Europe in a couple World Wars (Back to Back World War Champs!) while the Royal Family did what..? Nothing.

Get it Michelle.

When living in Scotland I always thought it was entertaining how much the Scottish hated the royal family. They were right on. America's equivalent would be like West Virginia paying for all of the Governor of Virginia's vacations and mansions. (I use West Virginia because it's the most like Scotland (toothless hillbillies) and Virginia because it's a lot like England (rich and racist)). The Scottish were really bothered that most of their news coverage had to do with the Prince's breakup. Now that Prince Billy Bob and his lady are back together and decided to get married, we all have the pleasure of hearing about the "juicy" wedding details in the months to come.

Best hire Jenny from the block if they want things to go smoothly. Don't be surprised if Daddy Yankee is the wedding singer.

By the way the hell is "Miss" Middleton thinking?

"William and Miss Middleton split for several months in 2007, and there was speculation in the British tabloids (always denied) that the royal family was dismayed by the supposedly déclassé behavior of the Middletons. Miss Middleton’s mother, Carole, was said to have chewed gum and used unaristocratic words like “toilet” and “pardon” in front of the queen..." - NYTimes

First of all I thought "pardon" was a polite, respectable word. And "toilet?" Somebody string this nappy headed ho up by her dentures and chop her in half. Just to put it into perspective, 20,000 people die each DAY from malnutrition and somewhere in the world you can't use the word "toilet" in front of the queen who offers absolutely nothing to society. Say "Pardon me but can you point me in the direction of one of your 347 toilets in this palace, I really have to drop a deuce?" after tapping the queen on the shoulder and her head might explode.

For some reason the only thing I can think of is this. Scenario: The queen needs an upgrade for her bathroom and needs a plumber. This guy (pictured below) is called up and told that he can't use the word "toilet" when talking to the queen. What I would give to listen to that conversation!