You must really hate your dad for not going out his way in teaching you; to treat people with respect for their individuality and culture and lifestyle. Your dad raise you nice and right to be a giant asshole. Oh no, does that mean as an asshole someone might rape you as well?
Hello Eva! Thanks for reading Play Pretty!
First off. I don't really hate my dad at all. I mean except for the obvious reasons: I'm short because of him, I'm part Filipino because of him (you know what that means), he's also a constant reminder of what I'll look like when I'm bald. So you see, most of these things are genetic and it'd be ridiculous of me to be mad at him because of SCIENCE. I ain't mad at him.
I also think my dad did a pretty good job at teaching me to be respectful to other people. I mean to be honest I don't really care about most people's "individuality" because I know one way or another, any lifestyle choices that promote one's "individuality" are justified to that specific Individual. That's fine. That's cool that you like wearing Ed Hardy t-shirts or dressing up in drag or clapping along to a Billy Joel concert (I see you white people). Please, keep on doing it. That's your choice and I respect the fact that you have a choice. I just don't like the choice you made and I'm going to make fun of you for it.
Am I really a giant asshole? What if I'm just promoting my individuality (a bitter, lonely, cynical, jaded, upset-stomached Marty) by poking fun at things that I personally find funny?
Or.
Are you really concerned that I'm actually a Giant Asshole? Like a villain in a weird horror movie. Blowing farts on people and suffocating little kids by falling on top of them.
Wait.
Are you concerned that since I'm a giant asshole I might get raped because you know of a serial asshole raper? Is there someone out there that only rapes assholes? I must say, that's a really specific target. If you're going to rape, why be so specific? (Please don't rape.) Do you get a lesser prison sentence if you get caught only raping assholes. Judge: "I sentence you to 25 years, but believe me, if you would have touched a vagina, mouth, or tree, you would be looking at a 30 year sentence MISTER!" And wouldn't that be ironic? Putting a guy (girl?) who only likes raping assholes in PRISON. That's like giving a hillbilly free Nascar tickets and telling him not to have fun.
Wait.
Are you concerned that since I'm a giant asshole I might get raped because you know of a serial asshole raper? Is there someone out there that only rapes assholes? I must say, that's a really specific target. If you're going to rape, why be so specific? (Please don't rape.) Do you get a lesser prison sentence if you get caught only raping assholes. Judge: "I sentence you to 25 years, but believe me, if you would have touched a vagina, mouth, or tree, you would be looking at a 30 year sentence MISTER!" And wouldn't that be ironic? Putting a guy (girl?) who only likes raping assholes in PRISON. That's like giving a hillbilly free Nascar tickets and telling him not to have fun.
How about this. I'll yell at my dad for not making me happier (not really his fault) if you yell at your dad for not passing on a sense of humor. Just please, don't add to your gauges. After a certain point you have to stop blaming him and starting living life.
Either way. Thanks for your concern and thanks for reading.
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| Eva you are right. I can kinda see it. I do see a bit of an asshole. |
- Marty
Lol Eva opened a can of worms!!
ReplyDeleteYou must thank your dad for teach you to treat your education with respect. He raise you nice and right to express your giant asshole opinions in way people understand in first read. Oh no, does that mean i dumb asshole for being unable to string together 3 sentences?; I'll just drop in semi-colon to make it look smart to me.
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